I'm constantly thinking about my children's behavior. Are they growing up to be nice? Obedient? Grateful? Are they kind? Helpful? Why do they still complain about toy pick-up, after all these years? Why don't they instantly say thank you?
It goes on and on. I'm afraid it's consistent with my being a highly conscientious person. I do these parenting self-checks to make sure I'm doing my best to prepare them for life.
Awhile back, I learned from the book Different Children, Different Needs, that I am what is called a corrective parent. Turns out that conscientious people not only correct themselves, but they correct their family as well. A lot.
Ugh! Exactly what I don't want to be! Corrective. It even sounds ugly.
The other day I was reading a child-rearing tips blog post. This mother served one of two lunches to her large brood everyday. She said the children didn't complain, nor would she have let them complain.
Excuse me? You mean I shouldn't be making three different breakfasts every morning, to satisfy three different children? And I shouldn't be buying a certain kind of whole wheat tortilla, to satisfy my Timothy? He should just eat what I serve, or go to bed, perhaps?
When I read such child-rearing posts, I always question whether we're strict enough. What's wrong with us? Should we spank every day? Take away more? Why are we working on the same behaviors for so long? Why are they so restless and active, compared to some?
If only we would correct more, they would behave better. Right?
I used to think that. But not now. It's too discouraging to the child. The more we correct, the less they want to conform. Consistency is key, but excessive correction is poison.
And I have a confession to make. I'm not more perfect than they are. Sometimes I have fits. Sometimes I'm not kind, or patient, or loving. Sometimes I rant and rave about the toys.....about the shoes......about the mud........about the water splashed outside the tub......about the jacket not on the hook.....about the cheesestick wrapper left on the floor.
What if I made a tape of myself? Would I want to throw up after hearing just one day? I'm sure I would destroy it as quickly as possible, lest anyone else ever hear it. Dealing with an ADHD child doesn't exactly boost parental mood, let me tell you.
But God is patient with me. He sees me as an individual, because he made me one. He works with me on one or two things at a time. He is sacrificial more than corrective.
I'm ashamed of the behavior I've displayed, especially in the last month during these two illnesses. Being sick depresses me. Not an excuse, just an unfortunate reality.
Tomorrow is a new day. I want to look at my children in a new way. Not as projects. No more of that.
I want to see them as beautiful works in progress. I want to encourage, love, support, and nurture them. I want to laugh with them. I want to be someone they genuinely like. Someone they want to emulate.
I'm sorry, Lord. I repent. Help me to extend grace and mercy to my children, while they work at shedding their childish ways. Help me to parent like you do. Remake me into someone who's humble, gentle and quiet-spirited.
Showing posts with label child rearing challenges. Show all posts
Showing posts with label child rearing challenges. Show all posts
Friday, November 13, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
homeschooling after baby walks
Wondering how to manage homeschooling after baby learns to walk (or crawl)? Here is our solution. We are blessed to have a family room and a large living room, so we decided to create, in the living room, an inviting and safe place for Anna Grace to play. It is close to the dining room, where most of the schooling takes place. From a certain chair at the dining room table, I can see what Anna is doing, and sing to her or play with her when I don't need to be directly involved with the schooling.
I should add that Anna's love language is physical touch, rather than quality time. This may not work so well for a quality time baby, who is only happy when Momma or Daddy is with her. Emily Rose and Daniel and Don are quality time people, and they rarely desire to be alone. Timothy and Anna take after me more.
The older children play in the family room, which we made into a playroom as soon as we moved to this house. We bought a jean couch, which has proven to be a good buy for a playroom (dark colored, easy to clean).
Anyhow, back to Anna's area. We arranged storage boxes to keep her out of dangerous corners, and out of the rest of the house. Furniture is arranged in a circle, so that there are only two exits--on either side of the couch.
I have always found, as a parent and earlier as a teacher, that toys and books need to be displayed in order to be utilized heavily. Tucking them away in crowded toy boxes doesn't entice kids. Likewise, books crowded into a bookshelf don't get used as often as those put in tubs and arranged around the room.
These storage boxes are the perfect height for Anna to manipulate the displayed toys and books. We change the toys and books every week to keep interest level high.
The floor quickly becomes a mess, over which baby can trip. We often jump in here and rearrange or pick up.
Putting noise-maker or push-button toys up on a couch or chair makes it easier for baby to use them.
This area is behind the couch, and not accessible to baby. I try to arrange books in tubs in every room, to entice Emily Rose and the boys to pick one up frequently. The magazine rack on the right-hand side has nature magazines in it. The bulk of the children's books are in shelves in the playroom, due to lack of space. I've been buying books--lately at thrift stores, earlier through Scholastic--for many years!
I didn't become an avid reader until the fourth grade, when I got hooked on Nancy Drew books. Don't despair if your elementary reader still loves being read to more than reading alone. It just might happen in upper elementary, when a certain chapter book series begins to float his boat. Start reading chapter books when they'll sit for them. This gives them a sampling of what's out there.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
pride before the fall
Anna Grace is our only baby who hasn't fallen off our bed. They all rolled sooner than we imagined they would. We were caught off-guard the first time, and just plain stupid when the other two fell.
So of course since Anna hasn't fallen off the bed, we thought we had it going on as parents.
Until this week.
Pride goeth before the fall.
Anna stood up in her high chair Sunday night. I said to Don, "Honey, she is standing up in her high chair now. We have to watch out for it."
Next morning, I forgot what she had done the night before. I gave her Cheerios and then went to quickly hang up some shirts in the boys' closet.
I heard the blood-curdling cry. I ran out there expecting to see blood everywhere.
There she was, sitting on her bottom, on the floor, crying her eyes out. No blood. No head injury.
She fell on her bottom. Yes, her bottom! That's the grace of God at work, surely.
He gave me a second warning. This time I won't mess up again.
Praise you, Jesus!
So of course since Anna hasn't fallen off the bed, we thought we had it going on as parents.
Until this week.
Pride goeth before the fall.
Anna stood up in her high chair Sunday night. I said to Don, "Honey, she is standing up in her high chair now. We have to watch out for it."
Next morning, I forgot what she had done the night before. I gave her Cheerios and then went to quickly hang up some shirts in the boys' closet.
I heard the blood-curdling cry. I ran out there expecting to see blood everywhere.
There she was, sitting on her bottom, on the floor, crying her eyes out. No blood. No head injury.
She fell on her bottom. Yes, her bottom! That's the grace of God at work, surely.
He gave me a second warning. This time I won't mess up again.
Praise you, Jesus!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
a telling breakfast
At the breakfast table:
Momma: "Timothy, since you're almost six now, I think you need to try milk with your cereal, as well as other new foods. It is easier and faster to eat cereal with milk, and it tastes better. We're starting school on Monday and breakfast needs to go faster."
Timothy (in aggravated, whiny voice): "But I don't like milk!" (He only drinks the Nestle Quick kind of chocolate milk.)
Momma: "I know you get scared about trying new foods. When you're scared, ask Jesus for help with bravery. And I will start praying more about your diet. You are missing too many fruits and vegetables. They help you live with less pain and less suffering."
Timothy: (Whining) "But I don't like Jesus anymore. And I don't like doing that Bible study anymore. I stopped listening. Jesus makes me feel like I always have to work. I want to play all day!" (No, I didn't make this stuff up. This kid is wrestling with God. What a telling statement his last one is (in bold). We all want our own way, don't we?)
Momma: "I see a lot of evidence that you love Jesus. And I see evidence every day that Jesus is working in your heart. What about when you dance with Mommy, to the Jesus songs on the radio? That makes you so very happy!"
Timothy: "But I can't see Jesus."
Momma: "Faith is believing in things we cannot see. God puts faith in our hearts. You don't have to try to believe. God will do the work."
Timothy: "But I don't believe in ANYTHING I can't see!" (Man, he's precocious, I'm saying to myself.)
Momma: "It's true that we don't see Jesus. But we see evidence that he is here. When Daniel aggravates you and makes you so very mad, you are patient with him and you always forgive him quickly. That is God--the Holy Spirit--working in your heart. On our own, we don't forgive people easily; sometimes we don't forgive and forget at all."
(He was still listening intently, so I kept going.) "And when a caterpillar turns into a beautiful butterfly, you can see Jesus through that. Something as wonderful as that doesn't happen by accident. The world is too beautiful and too perfect to be an accident."
"The comfort Jesus provides us is another bit of evidence that he exists. We can only comfort ourselves in ways that don't last--like with a new toy, a piece of chocolate cake, a cold drink, or a blanket. Jesus comforts us in our hearts and minds, and it lasts--if we don't get distracted from him. And he provides for our needs."
An aside: If you're wondering why some people starve to death, I think the answer is that God put enough food on the earth--he continues to do so--but we fail to share it. We don't do our part. It's a mystery why God allows us to continue to turn our backs on the hungry of the world. Governmental corruption in starving countries certainly contributes--the logistics are complicated. We can't put a military presence in every corrupt country. But we can send more food via missionaries, via planes, etc. More can be done, even though some of the food will end up in corrupt hands. Just feeding hungry people makes it more likely that they'll rise up against the corruption--on their own. We can even contribute more to the starving in our own country--via food banks, soup kitchens, etc. I submit to you that we are too comfortable. Sometimes, being comfortable is wrong, but only insofar as it blinds us to another's hunger--whether that hunger be physical or spiritual.
Just being somewhat uncomfortable for the past several months has opened my eyes greatly. I welcome more discomfort. I don't want blindness. I suspect God is growing me into a missionary.
Timothy: "But I want to see him."
My preaching ended there. Timothy is a mathematician. A scientist. He might always struggle with belief. There's no doubt in my mind that he loves Jesus; the last six months have brought too much evidence. Just the fact that he is uncomfortable--from the workings of the holy spirit, no doubt--is strong evidence. Spiritual growth is never comfortable.
The most important task now is to make sure the Gospel of grace is getting through.
Momma: "Timothy, since you're almost six now, I think you need to try milk with your cereal, as well as other new foods. It is easier and faster to eat cereal with milk, and it tastes better. We're starting school on Monday and breakfast needs to go faster."
Timothy (in aggravated, whiny voice): "But I don't like milk!" (He only drinks the Nestle Quick kind of chocolate milk.)
Momma: "I know you get scared about trying new foods. When you're scared, ask Jesus for help with bravery. And I will start praying more about your diet. You are missing too many fruits and vegetables. They help you live with less pain and less suffering."
Timothy: (Whining) "But I don't like Jesus anymore. And I don't like doing that Bible study anymore. I stopped listening. Jesus makes me feel like I always have to work. I want to play all day!" (No, I didn't make this stuff up. This kid is wrestling with God. What a telling statement his last one is (in bold). We all want our own way, don't we?)
Momma: "I see a lot of evidence that you love Jesus. And I see evidence every day that Jesus is working in your heart. What about when you dance with Mommy, to the Jesus songs on the radio? That makes you so very happy!"
Timothy: "But I can't see Jesus."
Momma: "Faith is believing in things we cannot see. God puts faith in our hearts. You don't have to try to believe. God will do the work."
Timothy: "But I don't believe in ANYTHING I can't see!" (Man, he's precocious, I'm saying to myself.)
Momma: "It's true that we don't see Jesus. But we see evidence that he is here. When Daniel aggravates you and makes you so very mad, you are patient with him and you always forgive him quickly. That is God--the Holy Spirit--working in your heart. On our own, we don't forgive people easily; sometimes we don't forgive and forget at all."
(He was still listening intently, so I kept going.) "And when a caterpillar turns into a beautiful butterfly, you can see Jesus through that. Something as wonderful as that doesn't happen by accident. The world is too beautiful and too perfect to be an accident."
"The comfort Jesus provides us is another bit of evidence that he exists. We can only comfort ourselves in ways that don't last--like with a new toy, a piece of chocolate cake, a cold drink, or a blanket. Jesus comforts us in our hearts and minds, and it lasts--if we don't get distracted from him. And he provides for our needs."
An aside: If you're wondering why some people starve to death, I think the answer is that God put enough food on the earth--he continues to do so--but we fail to share it. We don't do our part. It's a mystery why God allows us to continue to turn our backs on the hungry of the world. Governmental corruption in starving countries certainly contributes--the logistics are complicated. We can't put a military presence in every corrupt country. But we can send more food via missionaries, via planes, etc. More can be done, even though some of the food will end up in corrupt hands. Just feeding hungry people makes it more likely that they'll rise up against the corruption--on their own. We can even contribute more to the starving in our own country--via food banks, soup kitchens, etc. I submit to you that we are too comfortable. Sometimes, being comfortable is wrong, but only insofar as it blinds us to another's hunger--whether that hunger be physical or spiritual.
Just being somewhat uncomfortable for the past several months has opened my eyes greatly. I welcome more discomfort. I don't want blindness. I suspect God is growing me into a missionary.
Timothy: "But I want to see him."
My preaching ended there. Timothy is a mathematician. A scientist. He might always struggle with belief. There's no doubt in my mind that he loves Jesus; the last six months have brought too much evidence. Just the fact that he is uncomfortable--from the workings of the holy spirit, no doubt--is strong evidence. Spiritual growth is never comfortable.
The most important task now is to make sure the Gospel of grace is getting through.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
It's all good
That lull in the action I spoke of a few days ago? Short-lived. Anna Grace had a day and a half off from teething. My beloved baby is back to biting her crib rail, her knuckles, her toys, and the breast that nourishes her. Still, playtime is unaffected; she continues to practice her standing-up balancing act. She even took one step forward, before falling. I watched her face for frustration. None; there was only excitement displayed on her beautiful, porcelain face. She simply got back up and tried again, and again, and again. I stand amazed at her physical capabilities! Now if she would only babble more! My children all favored physical feats over language development. Is it that hyper-active gene pool?
Sleep is once again hard for Anna to come by. Momma's day is taken up with getting her to sleep, or helping her go back to sleep. In between, there is a load of laundry done, a sandwich made, a drink poured, a hug given, a dance danced, or a spilled drink wiped up. It's all good..all rich. Yes, I have resorted to Tylenol for the teething--for her not me. LOL It helps some.
And the homeschool planning? Exactly two hours have been painstakingly carved out for this endeavor. Anna's teething situation has prevented me from having additional blocks of time, thus far. And yet, I am relaxed. When called by God to do something, failure isn't possible, so long as we follow His lead.
My task later today is to use the computer to design a homeschooling prayer journal. That must be first priority, lest my teaching load start to overwhelm. For not only must I formally teach the boys, but Emily Rose needs extra storytime, more singing, and color, number, shape, and phonics work. Anna Grace needs vocabulary, singing and rhyme time. Homeschooling literally starts at the birth of each child, and continues until they pack up their clunkers for college.
Incidentally, I never drank in college, nor did I run with anyone who drank. And yet these binge-drinking news stories have me petrified about sending my kids to college! How does one send them off, with such danger lurking? Daniel is careful...even timid and anxious; about him, I need not be concerned. It's Timothy and Rose I'll worry about.
Anyhow, the future is already being prayed about. It pays sometimes to be a worrier. Every friendship, every courtship, every spouse, every marriage...even the purity and fertility of each child--I've got it all covered. My nervousness is good for something after all.
Now back to that journal I'll design tonight; it will guide me through daily prayer for the learning needs of each child. With such a tool, their minds will definitely get filled this year--not from me, but from Him, through me.
Anna Grace had another toe prick for her iron level yesterday. After 3.5 weeks of iron-food treatment, her level went from 8.9 to 9.5--despite her six-day virus. It is common for illnesses to temporarily lower hemoglobin levels. A chart I consulted indicated that for a nine-month-old baby, a hemoglobin level of less than 10 is considered anemic. Anna will be nine months in two weeks. She is gaining ground anyway, and will be tested again in October.
Sleep is once again hard for Anna to come by. Momma's day is taken up with getting her to sleep, or helping her go back to sleep. In between, there is a load of laundry done, a sandwich made, a drink poured, a hug given, a dance danced, or a spilled drink wiped up. It's all good..all rich. Yes, I have resorted to Tylenol for the teething--for her not me. LOL It helps some.
And the homeschool planning? Exactly two hours have been painstakingly carved out for this endeavor. Anna's teething situation has prevented me from having additional blocks of time, thus far. And yet, I am relaxed. When called by God to do something, failure isn't possible, so long as we follow His lead.
My task later today is to use the computer to design a homeschooling prayer journal. That must be first priority, lest my teaching load start to overwhelm. For not only must I formally teach the boys, but Emily Rose needs extra storytime, more singing, and color, number, shape, and phonics work. Anna Grace needs vocabulary, singing and rhyme time. Homeschooling literally starts at the birth of each child, and continues until they pack up their clunkers for college.
Incidentally, I never drank in college, nor did I run with anyone who drank. And yet these binge-drinking news stories have me petrified about sending my kids to college! How does one send them off, with such danger lurking? Daniel is careful...even timid and anxious; about him, I need not be concerned. It's Timothy and Rose I'll worry about.
Anyhow, the future is already being prayed about. It pays sometimes to be a worrier. Every friendship, every courtship, every spouse, every marriage...even the purity and fertility of each child--I've got it all covered. My nervousness is good for something after all.
Now back to that journal I'll design tonight; it will guide me through daily prayer for the learning needs of each child. With such a tool, their minds will definitely get filled this year--not from me, but from Him, through me.
Anna Grace had another toe prick for her iron level yesterday. After 3.5 weeks of iron-food treatment, her level went from 8.9 to 9.5--despite her six-day virus. It is common for illnesses to temporarily lower hemoglobin levels. A chart I consulted indicated that for a nine-month-old baby, a hemoglobin level of less than 10 is considered anemic. Anna will be nine months in two weeks. She is gaining ground anyway, and will be tested again in October.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
farther-reaching
Anna Grace slept a little longer this morning. Sleeping alongside me, she woke at 5:20 a.m. I nursed her, hoping she would drift off again, as in days of old. But no. Instead, she used my head to pull up on. Getting the message, I put her in her crib, thinking she would try some cruising steps. But guess what? She laid down and fell asleep! My heart sang! I laid my exhausted head down and actually SMILED myself to sleep.
She woke again at 6:45 a.m., after which I nursed her again, hoping for the same magic. But no, she wanted to play. 6:45 is respectable for a baby, so we went out to the living room.
Come naptime, it was more of the same hyperactive business--pulling up in the crib, cruising--anything but lying down. I gave it twenty minutes, then held her down gently in my bed, waiting for her will to weaken. Lying next to me, in the spoon position I forced her into, she finally relaxed and drifted off. I watched the clock, thinking after twenty minutes I would try transferring her to her crib. The house, as you can imagine after three days of fighting Anna for naps, was beyond disheveled. The list of has-to-be-dones was long.
But instead of attending to the list, I allowed myself to be charmed by her smell, her oh-so-soft skin, her even breathing. I came to my senses, and counted myself blessed to have such a babe in my arms for an hour, while Daddy read his computer textbook outside, and the other children enjoyed water play.
The house is still disheveled, but God answered yesterday's prayer. Today I made the most of my time with these precious children. Even if I had successfully transferred Anna to her crib and used the time to tidy up a bit, the tidiness wouldn't have lasted till evening.
But the memory of my sweet sleeping babe--my last babe--spooned against me on a pleasant summer day? THAT is a keeper. The prayers uttered about her future, spoken in my mind whilst she lay in my protective arms, will impact her far more than a slightly tidier house ever will.
Lord, help me utilize more of these farther-reaching parenting opportunities. And.....a house fairy would be nice too. Just sayin'.
She woke again at 6:45 a.m., after which I nursed her again, hoping for the same magic. But no, she wanted to play. 6:45 is respectable for a baby, so we went out to the living room.
Come naptime, it was more of the same hyperactive business--pulling up in the crib, cruising--anything but lying down. I gave it twenty minutes, then held her down gently in my bed, waiting for her will to weaken. Lying next to me, in the spoon position I forced her into, she finally relaxed and drifted off. I watched the clock, thinking after twenty minutes I would try transferring her to her crib. The house, as you can imagine after three days of fighting Anna for naps, was beyond disheveled. The list of has-to-be-dones was long.
But instead of attending to the list, I allowed myself to be charmed by her smell, her oh-so-soft skin, her even breathing. I came to my senses, and counted myself blessed to have such a babe in my arms for an hour, while Daddy read his computer textbook outside, and the other children enjoyed water play.
The house is still disheveled, but God answered yesterday's prayer. Today I made the most of my time with these precious children. Even if I had successfully transferred Anna to her crib and used the time to tidy up a bit, the tidiness wouldn't have lasted till evening.
But the memory of my sweet sleeping babe--my last babe--spooned against me on a pleasant summer day? THAT is a keeper. The prayers uttered about her future, spoken in my mind whilst she lay in my protective arms, will impact her far more than a slightly tidier house ever will.
Lord, help me utilize more of these farther-reaching parenting opportunities. And.....a house fairy would be nice too. Just sayin'.
Friday, July 31, 2009
gym time, and empty nests
Anna is consumed by her new pulling-up skills, and by her even-newer cruising skills. She deems them SO worthy of her time, in fact, that she's decided sleep is vastly overrated.
Anna Grace: "I haven't got time for SLEEP anymore, Mommy. I don't exactly know when the Infant Olympics start, but by golly, I want to be ready. You won't stand in my way now--will you, Mommy? You go ahead and sleep, Mommy, if you can, while I rise at 5:00 a.m. and happily squeal my way through a good ninety minutes of gym time. Don't you and Daddy pay me any mind. I can manage this on my own. I'll give you a holler when morning gym time is over."
Mommy: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
That's me, primal screaming after three days of 5:00 a.m. risings, and naps that don't occur unless I hold a crying, frustrated, overtired, 7.5-month-old gym fanatic down long enough for her to realize she is exhausted. Then, because she is SO exhausted, I am forced to hold her for her entire nap, without moving a muscle, because otherwise her jumpy, overtired body wakes up over the slightest sound or movement.
A month ago we achieved a very good nap routine that was working for me, finally. I would nurse her, kiss her, put her in her crib, and within ten minutes, she was out.
Yes, I know. This too shall pass. Trouble is, every time something passes, some other trying thing is right on its heels. Constant. That's what life is like when your hyper-active children outnumber your couch-potato children. My ratio is three to one. This life is blessed, charmed, yes. But constant most of all.
Around dinnertime my nerves were so shot, and my ADHD son so intent on doing me in, that I looked at my poor husband and said, "I'm leaving now. Trust me, it's necessary."
At first, I got in the van by myself. Anna was asleep--finally. Don would only have the three of them. Then I thought better of this, and went back in and grabbed Emily Rose, who is as hyper as can be and could make Daddy crazy without help. I figured I could handle her in her carseat, even in my agitated, overly-fatigued state. Thank God for carseats!
The two of us got McDonald's chocolate chip cookies to calm our (my) nerves, and then we drove all around the farmlands surrounding our housing track.
On our sanity-saving trip we saw a beautiful doe, about 20 grazing horses, a blue heron, two lakes, acres and acres of corn and alfalfa, and many beautiful, well-tended flower gardens--all within a thirty-minute time frame. It was just what I needed. Scenes of nature speak such volumes to me. They remind me that God has a plan--that nothing is accidental. There is order, beauty, perfection--so unlike my parenting, or my home, where new problems keep throwing my efforts--and my nerves--asunder.
I don't quite know why God blessed a nervous-leaning mother with so many hyper-active children. Makes more sense for a very relaxed mother to have such a brood--doesn't it?
It's not misbehavior I'm talking about, exactly. It's high-volume exuberance. A penchant for movement, rather than tabletop activities, or quiet-like pursuits. A penchant for speed, rather than leisure. A penchant for over-excitability, rather than for calm.
I can only trust that He knows what I need--what my children need. It need not make sense to me.
My husband is not perfect, but for all intents and purposes, to me, he's a saint. Just the saint I need. Is he out of full-time work because God knew I needed help with these full-of-life children, in this season? We are basically on our own here. There's no reliable "village" on which to lean. My father and my aunts have their own problems--their own pursuits.
It is what it is. And my personality is what it is. I didn't choose nervousness--it was chosen for me. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, as are my exuberant children.
God, help me learn to celebrate exuberance--rather than run from it. Twenty years from now, I'll be 63 years old, and I'll long for the noise and chaos of my "youth". I know this; I can see the very day, in my mind's eye. The first day of my empty nest. My Anna will be 20 years old.
Don't let me look back with regret, Lord, for what I DIDN'T do, to make the most of every day with these precious children. Take the reins back from ME--the stubborn one--when I so foolishly grab them. Order our days, our hours. And bless us with your Mercy and your Grace, Lord, as always.
Amen.
Anna Grace: "I haven't got time for SLEEP anymore, Mommy. I don't exactly know when the Infant Olympics start, but by golly, I want to be ready. You won't stand in my way now--will you, Mommy? You go ahead and sleep, Mommy, if you can, while I rise at 5:00 a.m. and happily squeal my way through a good ninety minutes of gym time. Don't you and Daddy pay me any mind. I can manage this on my own. I'll give you a holler when morning gym time is over."
Mommy: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
That's me, primal screaming after three days of 5:00 a.m. risings, and naps that don't occur unless I hold a crying, frustrated, overtired, 7.5-month-old gym fanatic down long enough for her to realize she is exhausted. Then, because she is SO exhausted, I am forced to hold her for her entire nap, without moving a muscle, because otherwise her jumpy, overtired body wakes up over the slightest sound or movement.
A month ago we achieved a very good nap routine that was working for me, finally. I would nurse her, kiss her, put her in her crib, and within ten minutes, she was out.
Yes, I know. This too shall pass. Trouble is, every time something passes, some other trying thing is right on its heels. Constant. That's what life is like when your hyper-active children outnumber your couch-potato children. My ratio is three to one. This life is blessed, charmed, yes. But constant most of all.
Around dinnertime my nerves were so shot, and my ADHD son so intent on doing me in, that I looked at my poor husband and said, "I'm leaving now. Trust me, it's necessary."
At first, I got in the van by myself. Anna was asleep--finally. Don would only have the three of them. Then I thought better of this, and went back in and grabbed Emily Rose, who is as hyper as can be and could make Daddy crazy without help. I figured I could handle her in her carseat, even in my agitated, overly-fatigued state. Thank God for carseats!
The two of us got McDonald's chocolate chip cookies to calm our (my) nerves, and then we drove all around the farmlands surrounding our housing track.
On our sanity-saving trip we saw a beautiful doe, about 20 grazing horses, a blue heron, two lakes, acres and acres of corn and alfalfa, and many beautiful, well-tended flower gardens--all within a thirty-minute time frame. It was just what I needed. Scenes of nature speak such volumes to me. They remind me that God has a plan--that nothing is accidental. There is order, beauty, perfection--so unlike my parenting, or my home, where new problems keep throwing my efforts--and my nerves--asunder.
I don't quite know why God blessed a nervous-leaning mother with so many hyper-active children. Makes more sense for a very relaxed mother to have such a brood--doesn't it?
It's not misbehavior I'm talking about, exactly. It's high-volume exuberance. A penchant for movement, rather than tabletop activities, or quiet-like pursuits. A penchant for speed, rather than leisure. A penchant for over-excitability, rather than for calm.
I can only trust that He knows what I need--what my children need. It need not make sense to me.
My husband is not perfect, but for all intents and purposes, to me, he's a saint. Just the saint I need. Is he out of full-time work because God knew I needed help with these full-of-life children, in this season? We are basically on our own here. There's no reliable "village" on which to lean. My father and my aunts have their own problems--their own pursuits.
It is what it is. And my personality is what it is. I didn't choose nervousness--it was chosen for me. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, as are my exuberant children.
God, help me learn to celebrate exuberance--rather than run from it. Twenty years from now, I'll be 63 years old, and I'll long for the noise and chaos of my "youth". I know this; I can see the very day, in my mind's eye. The first day of my empty nest. My Anna will be 20 years old.
Don't let me look back with regret, Lord, for what I DIDN'T do, to make the most of every day with these precious children. Take the reins back from ME--the stubborn one--when I so foolishly grab them. Order our days, our hours. And bless us with your Mercy and your Grace, Lord, as always.
Amen.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
An Exchange
You know your math-loving five-year-old is under the influence of the Holy Spirit when you have this exchange:
Mommy: "Timmy, we're going to a church event. Time to get changed."
Timothy: "What time do we have to be there?"
Mommy: "Four o'clock."
Timothy: "But we can't!" That's what time Cyberchase is on!"
Timothy: Ten seconds later - "Oh, but Jesus is more important than the TV. I know that."
We make parenting mistakes frequently--especially in the area of saying too much around the kids about our stressers. Learning to control the tongue is the hardest thing most of us have to deal with, at least in the area of self-control. It's so nice to be reminded that God's grace is always there--making the best of our imperfect parenting efforts.
I guess these guys will turn out fine after all.
Mommy: "Timmy, we're going to a church event. Time to get changed."
Timothy: "What time do we have to be there?"
Mommy: "Four o'clock."
Timothy: "But we can't!" That's what time Cyberchase is on!"
Timothy: Ten seconds later - "Oh, but Jesus is more important than the TV. I know that."
We make parenting mistakes frequently--especially in the area of saying too much around the kids about our stressers. Learning to control the tongue is the hardest thing most of us have to deal with, at least in the area of self-control. It's so nice to be reminded that God's grace is always there--making the best of our imperfect parenting efforts.
I guess these guys will turn out fine after all.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
When You're Two
Friends, I am going insane trying to figure out my two-year-old these days! Last night I went to bed at 11:30 p.m. I promptly fell asleep nursing Anna. Don was at work, and the other three children were asleep in their beds. Or so I thought.
Around 12:45 a.m., Emily Rose wakes me while crawling into my bed. Doesn't say a word--just climbs in and starts fiddling with her security blanket. She was looking for the blanket's satin tag, which she likes to stroke to help her fall asleep.
I decided it was best to say nothing for the time being, so that I could get the baby into her crib without Emily waking her.
Don arrived home soon after this, and he carried Emily back to bed. I then put the baby into her crib and went in to see what was up with Emily. She hadn't previously been a night waker...or at least when she had a crib, we saw no evidence that she was waking to this extent at night. I hadn't locked her door before I went to bed; I planned to be up before her the next morning. Little did I know that her house wandering would include middle-of-the-night escapades.
Don and I discovered--after giving her a lecture and tucking her in--that she had been to the playroom, and had gotten herself a sucker, which she had taken a couple of licks from and then left on the queen bed in her room...sticking to the comforter.
While in the kitchen, she'd tried to put a straw into a juice box, but failed...spilled juice was a clue. Part of me wanted to smile, as I looked at the evidence of her grown-up escapade. I walked all around the house, wandering what surprises I would find. Nothing else looked suspect..this time. Too bad she hadn't thought to put in a load of laundry for me. LOL
I still don't like the thought of locking her door. What if she might have to vomit in the middle of the night (no, she isn't sick, but these things often come on at night), or have some other need for which she would want me? It just seems so risky to lock a child in a room while Mommy and Daddy sleep. We have air filters running in all the bedrooms, so the house isn't silent. The filters drown out some noise, making it hard to hear subtle sounds. But the filters sure help when there is a family history of hay fever, indoor allergy, and eczema.
I've learned that when young children wake in the middle of the night, they often assume it's morning--hence, the getting up and walking around. What's strange to me is that this very independent young lady is the same young lady who has developed a second-stage fear of the church nursery. She wants her Momma. She doesn't want to be left behind when I go to the store, or to the bank, or anywhere--unless there is outdoor water play on the agenda and Daddy is willing to supervise. Otherwise, she likes Momma around. And when I come home from these short errands, she runs into my arms, all smiles, and says, "Mommy! Mommy's home!" Her face displays sheer joy! Oh, how it melts every inch of me!
Is this how growing up is? They have powerful urges to sample a bit of the big leagues, and then they want to run back to Momma's arms?
There's a LOT going on in that little girl's head right now. I'm recording it all here for her benefit. Maybe she'll have a little girl someday who is just like her. My heart wants to cheer her ingenuity--her independence, but my head wants to do everything possible to keep her safe. I just don't think that includes a locked door.
Around 12:45 a.m., Emily Rose wakes me while crawling into my bed. Doesn't say a word--just climbs in and starts fiddling with her security blanket. She was looking for the blanket's satin tag, which she likes to stroke to help her fall asleep.
I decided it was best to say nothing for the time being, so that I could get the baby into her crib without Emily waking her.
Don arrived home soon after this, and he carried Emily back to bed. I then put the baby into her crib and went in to see what was up with Emily. She hadn't previously been a night waker...or at least when she had a crib, we saw no evidence that she was waking to this extent at night. I hadn't locked her door before I went to bed; I planned to be up before her the next morning. Little did I know that her house wandering would include middle-of-the-night escapades.
Don and I discovered--after giving her a lecture and tucking her in--that she had been to the playroom, and had gotten herself a sucker, which she had taken a couple of licks from and then left on the queen bed in her room...sticking to the comforter.
While in the kitchen, she'd tried to put a straw into a juice box, but failed...spilled juice was a clue. Part of me wanted to smile, as I looked at the evidence of her grown-up escapade. I walked all around the house, wandering what surprises I would find. Nothing else looked suspect..this time. Too bad she hadn't thought to put in a load of laundry for me. LOL
I still don't like the thought of locking her door. What if she might have to vomit in the middle of the night (no, she isn't sick, but these things often come on at night), or have some other need for which she would want me? It just seems so risky to lock a child in a room while Mommy and Daddy sleep. We have air filters running in all the bedrooms, so the house isn't silent. The filters drown out some noise, making it hard to hear subtle sounds. But the filters sure help when there is a family history of hay fever, indoor allergy, and eczema.
I've learned that when young children wake in the middle of the night, they often assume it's morning--hence, the getting up and walking around. What's strange to me is that this very independent young lady is the same young lady who has developed a second-stage fear of the church nursery. She wants her Momma. She doesn't want to be left behind when I go to the store, or to the bank, or anywhere--unless there is outdoor water play on the agenda and Daddy is willing to supervise. Otherwise, she likes Momma around. And when I come home from these short errands, she runs into my arms, all smiles, and says, "Mommy! Mommy's home!" Her face displays sheer joy! Oh, how it melts every inch of me!
Is this how growing up is? They have powerful urges to sample a bit of the big leagues, and then they want to run back to Momma's arms?
There's a LOT going on in that little girl's head right now. I'm recording it all here for her benefit. Maybe she'll have a little girl someday who is just like her. My heart wants to cheer her ingenuity--her independence, but my head wants to do everything possible to keep her safe. I just don't think that includes a locked door.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Record your answers!
Something rather miraculous happened last night! And the whole thing made me realize that I need to start recording answers to prayer. Seeing the answers down on paper to reflect on would be so encouraging! I'm willing to bet that many more prayers than I realize DO get "yes" answers.
I have NOT prayed about Anna Grace sleeping through the night. While most formula babies and babies who have cried it out do sleep through the night by six months, it is unusual for a nursing baby to do so. A low percentage of American babies are still nursing after six months, and consequently, any statistic about sleeping through the night the first year is skewed and not really applicable to nursing families. The possibility that Anna might do this just didn't occur to me.
Now, when Emily Rose began to wander the house in the mornings a few days ago, I did lament and whine to my God.
Pam: "Why, oh why can't SOMETHING be easy!!?? How in the world am I going to keep these children safe?? There are so many variables to safety when you have four young children, God! Anna is now sitting, meaning that she sometimes falls into pieces of furniture, which makes her rather mad, and hurt! More than ever, I have to watch her every move. I can't remove the furniture--that's for sure, God. Between the four of them, I'm going out of my mind regarding safety!"
Only after this stellar whining performance did I humble myself to pray about the issue. Unwise order of priorities, I know.
This morning, I awoke to Anna's cries from her crib at 5:37 a.m. I went to get her (crib is in our room), and was confused about why she was in her crib. Then I looked at the clock, and realized that I had put her in the crib at 8:00 p.m. the night before. And then I forced myself to go to bed at 11:30, knowing that I HAD to start doing something about my lack of sleep. Well, as I picked her up, I realized that she had never woken up and nursed in bed with me--the whole night! She actually slept from 8:00 p.m. to 5:37 a.m., and I never heard a peep--even with Don getting back from work and slipping into bed after 3:00 a.m.! He was real pleased (NOT) when in my excitement, I woke him up and said, "Honey, Anna slept through the night!" He opened his eyes briefly to say that the night wasn't over yet.
Now the part about the prayer. Anna felt well rested and would not go back to sleep, even after she nursed and filled her tummy. At 6:20 I took her out to the living room, which means I was up for the day and fully awake when Emily Rose woke up!! God was answering my prayer about keeping Emily safe in the morning, by having Anna sleep through the night! I slept six hours straight, which hasn't occurred in a very long time. (Three hours straight is a good night.) I feel great today, and it was nice to be so alert and happy while I cared for my children this morning.
She may not sleep through the night again for a long time. But today, God encouraged me. He IS listening! And I SHOULD record his answers to my prayers. Currently I'm reading a book about spiritual reformation and it TOO has encouraged me to record not only prayer requests, but also the ANSWERS. Very elementary concept, leading to very powerful results.
Hey Liz, thank you for your comments. I actually do have a stellar diet (high in fiber, low in fat)and looking like the food pyramid. Any health problems for me stem from lack of sleep. Since I am a night person living in an early-morning culture, I've never gotten adequate sleep. It is a matter of self-discipline, and now I MUST do something about it. I will check out the websites you gave, and get the Primrose Oil. I probably won't use any hormone replacement, as my mom had breast cancer (minor lump in early stage) in her mid-sixties, partly from being given hormones when she started perimenopause at 45 years old.
I have NOT prayed about Anna Grace sleeping through the night. While most formula babies and babies who have cried it out do sleep through the night by six months, it is unusual for a nursing baby to do so. A low percentage of American babies are still nursing after six months, and consequently, any statistic about sleeping through the night the first year is skewed and not really applicable to nursing families. The possibility that Anna might do this just didn't occur to me.
Now, when Emily Rose began to wander the house in the mornings a few days ago, I did lament and whine to my God.
Pam: "Why, oh why can't SOMETHING be easy!!?? How in the world am I going to keep these children safe?? There are so many variables to safety when you have four young children, God! Anna is now sitting, meaning that she sometimes falls into pieces of furniture, which makes her rather mad, and hurt! More than ever, I have to watch her every move. I can't remove the furniture--that's for sure, God. Between the four of them, I'm going out of my mind regarding safety!"
Only after this stellar whining performance did I humble myself to pray about the issue. Unwise order of priorities, I know.
This morning, I awoke to Anna's cries from her crib at 5:37 a.m. I went to get her (crib is in our room), and was confused about why she was in her crib. Then I looked at the clock, and realized that I had put her in the crib at 8:00 p.m. the night before. And then I forced myself to go to bed at 11:30, knowing that I HAD to start doing something about my lack of sleep. Well, as I picked her up, I realized that she had never woken up and nursed in bed with me--the whole night! She actually slept from 8:00 p.m. to 5:37 a.m., and I never heard a peep--even with Don getting back from work and slipping into bed after 3:00 a.m.! He was real pleased (NOT) when in my excitement, I woke him up and said, "Honey, Anna slept through the night!" He opened his eyes briefly to say that the night wasn't over yet.
Now the part about the prayer. Anna felt well rested and would not go back to sleep, even after she nursed and filled her tummy. At 6:20 I took her out to the living room, which means I was up for the day and fully awake when Emily Rose woke up!! God was answering my prayer about keeping Emily safe in the morning, by having Anna sleep through the night! I slept six hours straight, which hasn't occurred in a very long time. (Three hours straight is a good night.) I feel great today, and it was nice to be so alert and happy while I cared for my children this morning.
She may not sleep through the night again for a long time. But today, God encouraged me. He IS listening! And I SHOULD record his answers to my prayers. Currently I'm reading a book about spiritual reformation and it TOO has encouraged me to record not only prayer requests, but also the ANSWERS. Very elementary concept, leading to very powerful results.
Hey Liz, thank you for your comments. I actually do have a stellar diet (high in fiber, low in fat)and looking like the food pyramid. Any health problems for me stem from lack of sleep. Since I am a night person living in an early-morning culture, I've never gotten adequate sleep. It is a matter of self-discipline, and now I MUST do something about it. I will check out the websites you gave, and get the Primrose Oil. I probably won't use any hormone replacement, as my mom had breast cancer (minor lump in early stage) in her mid-sixties, partly from being given hormones when she started perimenopause at 45 years old.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Never dull around here!
As of late, Emily Rose had been getting out of bed around 6:30 a.m. or 7:00 a.m. and coming directly into our bedroom for quiet morning cuddles. A beautiful thing. That changed two mornings ago. You remember the face cream she was after...and the cheesestick? Well, we planned to lock her door the next night, to avoid another potentially dangerous situation the following morning. Safety gates are useless; she gets over them or pushes them down quite easily.
But perimenopause puts one into foggy brain, just as pregnancy does. So I forgot to lock the door, and besides, I wasn't really comfortable with that solution because how would she get out in case of a fire? And setting our alarm for fifteen minutes before we expected her up wasn't feasible either; we can't get to bed before midnight (chores you know), and after midnight our sleep is interrupted often by Anna. Every minute of sleep counts.
But the fact that she got into the fish oil capsules yesterday morning really drove it home that this could be a matter of life and death. Luckily, they apparently taste horrible--when chewed! Yes, the evidence I found was that she chewed it up, and then must have swallowed the oil, and afterwards put the shell into a paper towel. Nice and neat, see? She could have left the shell sticking to the furniture. I hounded her for fifteen minutes about how many she had sampled, and finally came to the conclusion that it was only one. Stressful way to start the day, don't you think? Never a dull moment, I tell you. And yes, I have now cleared all surfaces of anything remotely dangerous. I'm a slow learner.
So yesterday, I bought the safety doorknob attachment...you know, the thing that is supposed to prevent children from turning door knobs? Well, suffice it to say that the score is now Emily = 2, Parents = 0. Yeah, she's a problem solver, gosh darnit. Problem solving is a wonderful thing when math and science come along in the schooling years....but at two? It's dangerous!
Anna Grace takes after big sister. We don't have any sound/music systems in our house. We could never afford anything except for a boom box. So yesterday I set it up in the living room so I could listen to our Christian station while I sorted and folded socks. The cord was well above Anna's crawling or reaching height...or so I thought. I left the room briefly to distribute socks into bedrooms. When I returned, there was no music playing, and the cord was in Anna's mouth. How she solved the problem of the cord being well above her head and reach, I'll never know. The only reasonable solution is that she pulled up onto a box in the area and had just enough arm strength to get to the cord and fall back down. That girl is not only a problem solver, but a very, very strong girl! She amazes me. Yesterday she mastered not only sitting up tall with a straight back, but also getting into this position from the floor. At seven and a quarter months Anna, you are quite the athletic type!
The newest thing you are working on is standing up. You use your arm strength to get yourself into a touch-your-toes standing-stretch position. I can tell you want to straighten up from there and stand, but you don't yet have the balance or stomach muscles to make it happen. But you try numerous times a day.
In other news, Daddy forgot Emily Rose last night at the church nursery. He was helping in Vacation Bible School and went to the boys' classroom to pick them up and then proceeded to drive home without Emily. This happened after he had just gone in there to check on her before getting the boys. She has been crying again in the nursery, for the last three weeks, after having stopped it about three months ago. We are baffled and stressed about it.
Last Sunday she had a rash on her upper chest, due to irritation from sunscreen. She has the most sensitive skin and almost always has some dermatitis--even though we are careful about not using anything scented and we always buy sensitive-skin products. Anyhow, she was crying on the church worker's lap and got overheated. This fact, along with the rash, made the worker think Emily was sick. She isolated Emily from the rest of the kids and had someone go and get Don from the sanctuary. He was baffled and felt her forehead, which the worker said was "burning up". It wasn't by this time, and Don told the worker that Emily definitely wasn't sick. He didn't mention her nearly constant eczema, as I would have done. The worker then agreed that she didn't seem hot. She asked Emily if she wanted to stay, and of course Emily said no. Don brought her home to me, since I stayed home with the baby that morning, and then he drove back to church. Emily is so active she would never stay put in the sanctuary.
Don took her to the nursery last night while he helped with VBS, so that Emily could "get back in the saddle" and try to get over her fear of the nursery. There is a very kind elderly blind gentleman who works the nursery with his wife during special events like Awana and VBS. Emily loves him, and spent time in his lap hugging him. That helped her fears and crying tremendously, thank the Lord. He isn't in there on Sundays, unfortunately.
Anyhow, back to Emily being forgotten. Daddy came to the door with the boys and I didn't see Emily in her carseat in the van. I said, "WHERE'S EMILY?!!" Don gave me a mildly alarmed look, and just said, "I'll go back and get her!" It's an eight-minute drive, and I was hoping no one was too inconvenienced by the shocking fact that, yes, we forgot our beloved daughter!
Meanwhile, I gave the boys a quick snack and hustled them into their pajamas and supervised the washing up and toothbrushing. They had returned home around 8:50 p.m., and it was now pushing 9:15. Did I mention I hate VBS with as much passion as my children love it? Yes, children get saved by the millions across the country due to VBS. That's a fabulous thing. But by Tuesday night, my children are so excited that they just can't fall asleep...until about 10:00 - 10:30!...leaving us to deal with the behavior issues that ultimately result. Grueling!
Last year we settled on an every other night schedule for VBS, knowing they would miss some fun. This year, Timothy is 5.5 years old, so we thought he could handle it better. But no, he was so excited he didn't fall asleep until 10:15 p.m. last night. Most churches now do it at night, due to all the dual-career families. That irritates me, but I know it's just one hellish week among many other normal weeks. Not really a big deal, and I'm ashamed for being so irritated.
After all, Timothy accepted the Lord during Monday night's VBS, so what in the world am I complaining about? He previously did have a relationship with the Lord, but he's never raised his hand before to a formal altar call. That public acknowledgement is important, and helps prep them for baptism and sharing their testimony when they feel brave enough. Daniel has been a Christian for quite awhile, but still doesn't feel like he's ready for the dunking. We told him he could wait until he feels ready, but that the Lord is always very pleased when we get baptized.
Anyhow, back again to the fact that our beloved daughter was forgotten about.
Daniel: "How COULD Daddy forget Emily? How could he do that!"
Mom: "I don't know." (Then I tried to change the subject.) "Did you have ever so much fun tonight?"
Daniel: "Emily must be crying her eyes out! I can't believe Daddy did that!"
Mom: "Well, didn't you and Timothy forget her as well? You didn't say anything to Daddy on the way home, did you?"
Daniel: "But I'm not the adult! Adults should NEVER forget their kids!"
And there you have it, Blogworld! Daniel is ready to fire us. And he's not even a teenager yet. God help us!
BTW: Emily was not the least traumatized by being forgotten. She seemed pretty unaware, actually.
But perimenopause puts one into foggy brain, just as pregnancy does. So I forgot to lock the door, and besides, I wasn't really comfortable with that solution because how would she get out in case of a fire? And setting our alarm for fifteen minutes before we expected her up wasn't feasible either; we can't get to bed before midnight (chores you know), and after midnight our sleep is interrupted often by Anna. Every minute of sleep counts.
But the fact that she got into the fish oil capsules yesterday morning really drove it home that this could be a matter of life and death. Luckily, they apparently taste horrible--when chewed! Yes, the evidence I found was that she chewed it up, and then must have swallowed the oil, and afterwards put the shell into a paper towel. Nice and neat, see? She could have left the shell sticking to the furniture. I hounded her for fifteen minutes about how many she had sampled, and finally came to the conclusion that it was only one. Stressful way to start the day, don't you think? Never a dull moment, I tell you. And yes, I have now cleared all surfaces of anything remotely dangerous. I'm a slow learner.
So yesterday, I bought the safety doorknob attachment...you know, the thing that is supposed to prevent children from turning door knobs? Well, suffice it to say that the score is now Emily = 2, Parents = 0. Yeah, she's a problem solver, gosh darnit. Problem solving is a wonderful thing when math and science come along in the schooling years....but at two? It's dangerous!
Anna Grace takes after big sister. We don't have any sound/music systems in our house. We could never afford anything except for a boom box. So yesterday I set it up in the living room so I could listen to our Christian station while I sorted and folded socks. The cord was well above Anna's crawling or reaching height...or so I thought. I left the room briefly to distribute socks into bedrooms. When I returned, there was no music playing, and the cord was in Anna's mouth. How she solved the problem of the cord being well above her head and reach, I'll never know. The only reasonable solution is that she pulled up onto a box in the area and had just enough arm strength to get to the cord and fall back down. That girl is not only a problem solver, but a very, very strong girl! She amazes me. Yesterday she mastered not only sitting up tall with a straight back, but also getting into this position from the floor. At seven and a quarter months Anna, you are quite the athletic type!
The newest thing you are working on is standing up. You use your arm strength to get yourself into a touch-your-toes standing-stretch position. I can tell you want to straighten up from there and stand, but you don't yet have the balance or stomach muscles to make it happen. But you try numerous times a day.
In other news, Daddy forgot Emily Rose last night at the church nursery. He was helping in Vacation Bible School and went to the boys' classroom to pick them up and then proceeded to drive home without Emily. This happened after he had just gone in there to check on her before getting the boys. She has been crying again in the nursery, for the last three weeks, after having stopped it about three months ago. We are baffled and stressed about it.
Last Sunday she had a rash on her upper chest, due to irritation from sunscreen. She has the most sensitive skin and almost always has some dermatitis--even though we are careful about not using anything scented and we always buy sensitive-skin products. Anyhow, she was crying on the church worker's lap and got overheated. This fact, along with the rash, made the worker think Emily was sick. She isolated Emily from the rest of the kids and had someone go and get Don from the sanctuary. He was baffled and felt her forehead, which the worker said was "burning up". It wasn't by this time, and Don told the worker that Emily definitely wasn't sick. He didn't mention her nearly constant eczema, as I would have done. The worker then agreed that she didn't seem hot. She asked Emily if she wanted to stay, and of course Emily said no. Don brought her home to me, since I stayed home with the baby that morning, and then he drove back to church. Emily is so active she would never stay put in the sanctuary.
Don took her to the nursery last night while he helped with VBS, so that Emily could "get back in the saddle" and try to get over her fear of the nursery. There is a very kind elderly blind gentleman who works the nursery with his wife during special events like Awana and VBS. Emily loves him, and spent time in his lap hugging him. That helped her fears and crying tremendously, thank the Lord. He isn't in there on Sundays, unfortunately.
Anyhow, back to Emily being forgotten. Daddy came to the door with the boys and I didn't see Emily in her carseat in the van. I said, "WHERE'S EMILY?!!" Don gave me a mildly alarmed look, and just said, "I'll go back and get her!" It's an eight-minute drive, and I was hoping no one was too inconvenienced by the shocking fact that, yes, we forgot our beloved daughter!
Meanwhile, I gave the boys a quick snack and hustled them into their pajamas and supervised the washing up and toothbrushing. They had returned home around 8:50 p.m., and it was now pushing 9:15. Did I mention I hate VBS with as much passion as my children love it? Yes, children get saved by the millions across the country due to VBS. That's a fabulous thing. But by Tuesday night, my children are so excited that they just can't fall asleep...until about 10:00 - 10:30!...leaving us to deal with the behavior issues that ultimately result. Grueling!
Last year we settled on an every other night schedule for VBS, knowing they would miss some fun. This year, Timothy is 5.5 years old, so we thought he could handle it better. But no, he was so excited he didn't fall asleep until 10:15 p.m. last night. Most churches now do it at night, due to all the dual-career families. That irritates me, but I know it's just one hellish week among many other normal weeks. Not really a big deal, and I'm ashamed for being so irritated.
After all, Timothy accepted the Lord during Monday night's VBS, so what in the world am I complaining about? He previously did have a relationship with the Lord, but he's never raised his hand before to a formal altar call. That public acknowledgement is important, and helps prep them for baptism and sharing their testimony when they feel brave enough. Daniel has been a Christian for quite awhile, but still doesn't feel like he's ready for the dunking. We told him he could wait until he feels ready, but that the Lord is always very pleased when we get baptized.
Anyhow, back again to the fact that our beloved daughter was forgotten about.
Daniel: "How COULD Daddy forget Emily? How could he do that!"
Mom: "I don't know." (Then I tried to change the subject.) "Did you have ever so much fun tonight?"
Daniel: "Emily must be crying her eyes out! I can't believe Daddy did that!"
Mom: "Well, didn't you and Timothy forget her as well? You didn't say anything to Daddy on the way home, did you?"
Daniel: "But I'm not the adult! Adults should NEVER forget their kids!"
And there you have it, Blogworld! Daniel is ready to fire us. And he's not even a teenager yet. God help us!
BTW: Emily was not the least traumatized by being forgotten. She seemed pretty unaware, actually.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Michelle Duggar says never get angry
There are some excellent parenting tips--including potty-training wisdom--in this recent Michelle Duggar article (link below). Very encouraging, and somewhat convicting for us less-than-saintly moms, who are still working on counting it all joy while we clean up messes. Especially those days when the spills and messes are occurring every half hour! Like today. When I come in here to put Anna down for her nap, it is usually a twenty to thirty-minute respite from having to wipe up something.
I recently told the kids they were going to use sippy cups for 7 days so Mommy could go on a "vacation". They laughed. My seven days are up, and I'm trying to laugh!
Seriously though, it isn't always spill from drinks. As often, it is spit up. Fairly often, it can be pee or breastmilk-style poo, leaked by a gleefully-happy baby who can't get enough rolling around or all-fours rocking. She only has strength to go a pace or two, then she falls on her face. Intuitively, she seems to understand that she must build muscle. Many days she reminds me of a mini-body builder.
Back to the nature of our messes. Every day now, it is grass or mud from the lawn, even though there is a towel by the back door for wiping feet, as well as a carpet. Michelle Duggar tells me I should NEVER get angry. Of course, she has teenagers to help. Maybe when everyone was seven and under, she was STILL WORKING ON never getting angry.
Anyhow, this is a good article.
I recently told the kids they were going to use sippy cups for 7 days so Mommy could go on a "vacation". They laughed. My seven days are up, and I'm trying to laugh!
Seriously though, it isn't always spill from drinks. As often, it is spit up. Fairly often, it can be pee or breastmilk-style poo, leaked by a gleefully-happy baby who can't get enough rolling around or all-fours rocking. She only has strength to go a pace or two, then she falls on her face. Intuitively, she seems to understand that she must build muscle. Many days she reminds me of a mini-body builder.
Back to the nature of our messes. Every day now, it is grass or mud from the lawn, even though there is a towel by the back door for wiping feet, as well as a carpet. Michelle Duggar tells me I should NEVER get angry. Of course, she has teenagers to help. Maybe when everyone was seven and under, she was STILL WORKING ON never getting angry.
Anyhow, this is a good article.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Emily's Night
I mentioned to Don yesterday that I wanted to price some toddler bedding, so during Emily's nap, the boys, Anna and Mommy went to Walmart, which is our go-to place because of the short, eight-minute drive. Other stores are about 25 minutes away.
As I feared, they had only ultra-commercialized-looking Disney princesses and a satin Dora set. We don't have any Disney videos, except for Pooh Bear (Mommy's favorite pal), so Emily can't yet relate to anything princess-oriented. I was discouraged, but after arriving home empty-handed, Don remembered that we still had a Target card someone had given us for Christmas. Yippee! Target is usually a good bet for housewares, so I put Anna down for her nap and when Rosey woke up the two of us set off together. The boys were very happy to stay behind, after having swindled a sprinkler out of me at Walmart. The temperature was hitting 90 degrees with humidity, so they didn't have to work on me too long. I knew it would cool Mommy and Daddy and baby off too, more than once this summer!
Emily hasn't gotten much in the way of material things since she was born, so I was very happy to be doing something special for her. We already had lots of puzzles and toys and books, and extended family has given her dolls, so there wasn't ever a need to purchase much.
We found a very lovely set at Target, complete with soft sheets! It's a pastel floral combination, with a coordinating pastel plaid pattern on the underside. She was thrilled! We also got matching decor for the wall--various sized pastel dots that give the effect of wallpaper.
And now for the sleep details. Thank you so much for your input. It didn't occur to me that she no longer needed much day sleep. Timothy gave up his nap at 30 months, if my memory serves me right, but I thought it was because I was 10 weeks pregnant with Emily and had to wean him. I had lost weight from morning sickness and didn't think it was wise to continue nursing; besides, there wasn't much milk left. Without being nursing to sleep for his nap, it just wasn't happening, even when I offered to lie down with him. He actually was very tired after about 3 o'clock for a good three months, leading to some cranky dinner and pre-bedtime behavior. Not a fun period.
I really thought his situation was an unfortunate fluke. So when the broken-record, put-them-back, matter-of-fact routine wasn't working to keep Emily in her crib, it didn't occur to me that she just wasn't TIRED enough to stay in. It should have, however, because of the way it happened, in comparison to Timothy's situation. He came out continuously, requiring me to camp outside his door for about 30-45 minutes, for about a week. Then the problem was solved; he was too tired to keep up with the fight. His body was ready for sleep.
Emily, when put back in, did try to stay in, but when she couldn't fall asleep, she would come back out, apparently from boredom. The time intervals were longer--most escapes were about fifteen minutes or more apart, up until 9 p.m.
After reading the suggestion that her nap was now cutting into her nighttime sleep, I planned for her to fall asleep around 9:00 p.m., after having awakened that morning at 7:oo, and napping for about two hours--leading to 12 hours total sleep, which is the minimum for her age. More would be better, but I have to work with her body and with the season. Maybe there is some beneficial biological reason for going to sleep at 9:00 in the summer. It is certainly true that our bodies respond to darkness, in a chemical way, priming us for sleep at that time.
Everything went swell! She was tired at 9:00 and only came out once. I decided not to threaten to spank. Firstly, I didn't think she would be bored or have an interest in coming out. Secondly, I want her to come out freely anytime she needs to use the bathroom.
This morning she initially awoke at 6:30, but when I told her it wasn't 7 yet, she went back in her room and fell asleep until 7:20. And, my goodness, she loves the bedding! I think it makes her feel like a big girl just to have covers on her bed, like the rest of us. She went in there a few times this morning just to get under the covers again. Cute.
I've heard it said from experts that the sleep we get before midnight is our best sleep of the night. If that's true, I would prefer an earlier bedtime for Emily, but that may happen in the fall naturally. We'll see how things go in the next week, with her overall wellness and cheerfulness.
Anyhow, thanks again for your input!
As I feared, they had only ultra-commercialized-looking Disney princesses and a satin Dora set. We don't have any Disney videos, except for Pooh Bear (Mommy's favorite pal), so Emily can't yet relate to anything princess-oriented. I was discouraged, but after arriving home empty-handed, Don remembered that we still had a Target card someone had given us for Christmas. Yippee! Target is usually a good bet for housewares, so I put Anna down for her nap and when Rosey woke up the two of us set off together. The boys were very happy to stay behind, after having swindled a sprinkler out of me at Walmart. The temperature was hitting 90 degrees with humidity, so they didn't have to work on me too long. I knew it would cool Mommy and Daddy and baby off too, more than once this summer!
Emily hasn't gotten much in the way of material things since she was born, so I was very happy to be doing something special for her. We already had lots of puzzles and toys and books, and extended family has given her dolls, so there wasn't ever a need to purchase much.
We found a very lovely set at Target, complete with soft sheets! It's a pastel floral combination, with a coordinating pastel plaid pattern on the underside. She was thrilled! We also got matching decor for the wall--various sized pastel dots that give the effect of wallpaper.
And now for the sleep details. Thank you so much for your input. It didn't occur to me that she no longer needed much day sleep. Timothy gave up his nap at 30 months, if my memory serves me right, but I thought it was because I was 10 weeks pregnant with Emily and had to wean him. I had lost weight from morning sickness and didn't think it was wise to continue nursing; besides, there wasn't much milk left. Without being nursing to sleep for his nap, it just wasn't happening, even when I offered to lie down with him. He actually was very tired after about 3 o'clock for a good three months, leading to some cranky dinner and pre-bedtime behavior. Not a fun period.
I really thought his situation was an unfortunate fluke. So when the broken-record, put-them-back, matter-of-fact routine wasn't working to keep Emily in her crib, it didn't occur to me that she just wasn't TIRED enough to stay in. It should have, however, because of the way it happened, in comparison to Timothy's situation. He came out continuously, requiring me to camp outside his door for about 30-45 minutes, for about a week. Then the problem was solved; he was too tired to keep up with the fight. His body was ready for sleep.
Emily, when put back in, did try to stay in, but when she couldn't fall asleep, she would come back out, apparently from boredom. The time intervals were longer--most escapes were about fifteen minutes or more apart, up until 9 p.m.
After reading the suggestion that her nap was now cutting into her nighttime sleep, I planned for her to fall asleep around 9:00 p.m., after having awakened that morning at 7:oo, and napping for about two hours--leading to 12 hours total sleep, which is the minimum for her age. More would be better, but I have to work with her body and with the season. Maybe there is some beneficial biological reason for going to sleep at 9:00 in the summer. It is certainly true that our bodies respond to darkness, in a chemical way, priming us for sleep at that time.
Everything went swell! She was tired at 9:00 and only came out once. I decided not to threaten to spank. Firstly, I didn't think she would be bored or have an interest in coming out. Secondly, I want her to come out freely anytime she needs to use the bathroom.
This morning she initially awoke at 6:30, but when I told her it wasn't 7 yet, she went back in her room and fell asleep until 7:20. And, my goodness, she loves the bedding! I think it makes her feel like a big girl just to have covers on her bed, like the rest of us. She went in there a few times this morning just to get under the covers again. Cute.
I've heard it said from experts that the sleep we get before midnight is our best sleep of the night. If that's true, I would prefer an earlier bedtime for Emily, but that may happen in the fall naturally. We'll see how things go in the next week, with her overall wellness and cheerfulness.
Anyhow, thanks again for your input!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
You Wouldn't Believe It!
Emily Rose awoke at 7 a.m. this morning, after having fallen asleep around 9:00 p.m., which gave her about an hour less nighttime sleep than she probably needs at this point. She used to get 12 hours of nighttime sleep, up to a month ago. Anyhow, this morning I added five hours to the 7 a.m., and figured she would be ready for her nap around 12:00 p.m. By the time I finished the routine it was 12:15, and I suspect she was asleep by 12:30 p.m.
She awoke at 2:00 p.m., and I added five hours to that, figuring she would be tired around 7 p.m. She is very active, gets lots of daily exercise, and has recently not had enough sleep; I think the five hours was a reasonable estimate. Her bedtime routine ended later than I'd hoped, at around 7:30 p.m. I shut her door as usual and went about putting Anna Grace down in my bedroom.
Meanwhile, Don was in the playroom doing Bible Study and story time with the boys. Emily got out of her crib about three times and went into the playroom, where Don intercepted her and put her back. I thought she had fallen asleep, since I didn't hear any of this.
Around 8:50 p.m., I finally got Anna to sleep and went out into the hall, where I heard Rose getting out of her crib. I went in there and found large and small stains of Desitin in various spots on the carpet, all over the crib, all over a few books, all over her face, and on a few stuffed toys. As well, she was naked from the waist down, and had peed all over her crib sheets, and on her pillow.
What I did NOT do was take this all in stride. After all, we'd been through a few frustrating weeks of sleep battles, with a child who had previously been a fantastic sleeper! I looked up to the heavens and screamed in anger and frustration. The Desitin, I knew, would ruin the carpet, but what was more frustrating was why her body hadn't shut down for sleep, after having been in the room close to 90 minutes, following a loving and soothing bedtime routine. She had been awake since 2 p.m.! What in the world is going on with her body?!!
We hadn't wanted to get into a spanking pattern over this situation, since that might require multiple spankings--for consistency sake. We can't spank the first time she does it and not the rest of the times; that would create more problems than it would solve. We both hate the thought of a child's day ending in multiple spankings. However, we did spank her for the Desitin mess.
I know the arising of sudden sleep issues is a very common problem with two-year-olds. That doesn't make it any easier to deal with. I'm at a loss right now, and wondering why tiredness isn't just taking over. Is she too hyperactive to stay still long enough to fall asleep as usual? Is she falling asleep around 9:00 p.m. because that is when it is close to being dark? And if so, why won't her body sleep until about 8:oo a.m. or so? Don has gone in there and laid on the room's queen bed in the morning, trying to get her to sleep longer after she initially comes out. It doesn't work.
I researched my Desitin stain-removal options, and tried rubbing alcohol, followed by Shout stain remover, followed by Dawn dish detergent. It looks better, but the carpet stains are not gone.
I also researched staying-in-bed issues for two-year-olds, and wasn't satisfied with any of the suggestions. She is too young for a sticker chart, or for waiting for a morning reward. We've already tried the broken record, keep-putting-them-back-in-bed routine, which would probably be close to the standard suggestion from most sleep experts.
We've thought of making her bedtime the same as the boys, so the whole house settles at the same time, and she doesn't feel like she is missing anything. This complicates story time, and if we choose this route, we'll have to make sure the boys have another story time during the day, using higher-level books.
Toddlers need 12 to 14 hours of sleep per day, and school-age children need 10 to 11. Ideally, at our house we need Emily to be falling asleep at 8:00 pm, waking in the morning between 7 and 8, and napping for two hours between 12:00 and 2:00 p.m. And the ideal scenario for the boys is falling asleep at 8:30 p.m., and waking around 7:oo--which is what they usually do.
We will pray tonight about trying a week of spanking, and we should also convert her crib to a toddler bed, to avoid any broken bones from her climbing out. Why not go through the dreaded bed-change transition while we're at it? My mom recently told me that my three-year-old nephew broke his arm from climbing over a safety gate. I sure don't need an emergency room visit!
Generally, I don't think buying new bedding helps with this issue, but I might price some Dora sheets/comforter for toddler beds, just in case.
Please, leave me a comment about how you lived through this same thing, and now have a peaceful household at bedtime, and a well-rested toddler/preschooler! Emily is 30 months old, which I think makes her a preschooler now. Thank you!
She awoke at 2:00 p.m., and I added five hours to that, figuring she would be tired around 7 p.m. She is very active, gets lots of daily exercise, and has recently not had enough sleep; I think the five hours was a reasonable estimate. Her bedtime routine ended later than I'd hoped, at around 7:30 p.m. I shut her door as usual and went about putting Anna Grace down in my bedroom.
Meanwhile, Don was in the playroom doing Bible Study and story time with the boys. Emily got out of her crib about three times and went into the playroom, where Don intercepted her and put her back. I thought she had fallen asleep, since I didn't hear any of this.
Around 8:50 p.m., I finally got Anna to sleep and went out into the hall, where I heard Rose getting out of her crib. I went in there and found large and small stains of Desitin in various spots on the carpet, all over the crib, all over a few books, all over her face, and on a few stuffed toys. As well, she was naked from the waist down, and had peed all over her crib sheets, and on her pillow.
What I did NOT do was take this all in stride. After all, we'd been through a few frustrating weeks of sleep battles, with a child who had previously been a fantastic sleeper! I looked up to the heavens and screamed in anger and frustration. The Desitin, I knew, would ruin the carpet, but what was more frustrating was why her body hadn't shut down for sleep, after having been in the room close to 90 minutes, following a loving and soothing bedtime routine. She had been awake since 2 p.m.! What in the world is going on with her body?!!
We hadn't wanted to get into a spanking pattern over this situation, since that might require multiple spankings--for consistency sake. We can't spank the first time she does it and not the rest of the times; that would create more problems than it would solve. We both hate the thought of a child's day ending in multiple spankings. However, we did spank her for the Desitin mess.
I know the arising of sudden sleep issues is a very common problem with two-year-olds. That doesn't make it any easier to deal with. I'm at a loss right now, and wondering why tiredness isn't just taking over. Is she too hyperactive to stay still long enough to fall asleep as usual? Is she falling asleep around 9:00 p.m. because that is when it is close to being dark? And if so, why won't her body sleep until about 8:oo a.m. or so? Don has gone in there and laid on the room's queen bed in the morning, trying to get her to sleep longer after she initially comes out. It doesn't work.
I researched my Desitin stain-removal options, and tried rubbing alcohol, followed by Shout stain remover, followed by Dawn dish detergent. It looks better, but the carpet stains are not gone.
I also researched staying-in-bed issues for two-year-olds, and wasn't satisfied with any of the suggestions. She is too young for a sticker chart, or for waiting for a morning reward. We've already tried the broken record, keep-putting-them-back-in-bed routine, which would probably be close to the standard suggestion from most sleep experts.
We've thought of making her bedtime the same as the boys, so the whole house settles at the same time, and she doesn't feel like she is missing anything. This complicates story time, and if we choose this route, we'll have to make sure the boys have another story time during the day, using higher-level books.
Toddlers need 12 to 14 hours of sleep per day, and school-age children need 10 to 11. Ideally, at our house we need Emily to be falling asleep at 8:00 pm, waking in the morning between 7 and 8, and napping for two hours between 12:00 and 2:00 p.m. And the ideal scenario for the boys is falling asleep at 8:30 p.m., and waking around 7:oo--which is what they usually do.
We will pray tonight about trying a week of spanking, and we should also convert her crib to a toddler bed, to avoid any broken bones from her climbing out. Why not go through the dreaded bed-change transition while we're at it? My mom recently told me that my three-year-old nephew broke his arm from climbing over a safety gate. I sure don't need an emergency room visit!
Generally, I don't think buying new bedding helps with this issue, but I might price some Dora sheets/comforter for toddler beds, just in case.
Please, leave me a comment about how you lived through this same thing, and now have a peaceful household at bedtime, and a well-rested toddler/preschooler! Emily is 30 months old, which I think makes her a preschooler now. Thank you!
Kids and the Sandman
This month I've been chronicling my efforts to infuse more outward joy into my day. This outward joy is not to be confused with my inward joy, which comes from the knowledge and assurance of my salvation in Christ, and from my relationship with Christ. That joy floods me whenever my favorite praise songs come on, and is powerful evidence of my spiritual transformation.
I wrote of my made-up joy songs; I would start singing whenever there was an incident threatening to rob me of joy, such as a major spill or a major behavior issue. Recently, Joy's post about her household triggers made me realize that I need to identify my own "triggers", so that I can pray through them, or avoid them altogether.
My joy-song method became counter-productive around here; they began causing the children to go into hyperactive, loud frenzies, from which they had trouble "coming down". One of the problems with having hyperactive kids is that when things get really happy or loosey goosey, you spend the next hour trying to get the household back down to earth, which usually involves one or more of them receiving consequences for not controlling themselves. While Daniel appears to be the only "officially hyperactive" one, Emily and Anna are close seconds. Any child between two and three will experience their highest lifetime activity level, according to the experts; so the jury is still out on Emily Rose's hyperactivity--time will tell more.
Anna is about the most wiggly baby you'll find; at six months, she is already crawling two steps or paces. And it takes two adults to bath her! You can't eat with her in your lap, due to her wiggling. Getting the food to your mouth while still keeping her in your lap is impossible. It is VERY common for there to be more than one ADD/ADHD child in a family, and also common for one or both parents to be similarly affected. I secretly think it's Don and he secretly thinks it's me. LOL
But that's digressing. As I read more about the struggles of other (homeschooling) women in regards to keeping a tidy house, I am getting to a place of acceptance about untidiness. That's not to say I won't keep working on it though. It is less of a trigger--although sticky, muddy floors will probably always get to me, and I'll probably continue to be on my hands and knees with wet paper towels 5 - 10 times a day.
One huge trigger that has followed me from the day I became a mom, is my preoccupation with my children's sleep patterns. Right now, Emily is still getting out of her crib before bedtime and before her nap, leading to less overall sleep. No, she isn't particularly cranky--something that the experts point out as a sign of too little sleep. And no, she isn't any MORE hyper than before--another sign of too little sleep. Yet she is getting less than the recommended sleep for her age, and less than she appeared to need even a month ago. We've been consistent in how we've dealt with it, but it continues. Could be the light coming into the room earlier than before, but there is little I can do about that. She has vertical blinds, which keep it pretty dark regardless.
Daniel is currently very excited about the fireflies, and rightly so. The trouble we have every year, from mid-June until the end of July, is that they light up around 9 p.m., and Daniel functions best when he is asleep by 8:30 p.m. We compromise and allow him to catch them every few nights, for fifteen minutes, after he has had his bath and his teeth brushed and his story time is done, leaving only prayer time and tuck in--which still puts him asleep at about 9:40 p.m. He's too excited to sleep before that, apparently from watching the flies light up his bedside. And what's the fun of catching them if one can't watch them do their lantern magic? I get all that. This is the stuff of which memories are made; we'd best not interfere too much.
The boys' sleep (and mine, Don's and Anna's) is also affected right now because when Emily gets out of her crib in the morning, she goes into the boys room and gets into bed with Daniel for a nice cuddle, (just precious--I agree) waking both boys, if they weren't already awake. She used to wake up around 8 or 8:30, but now it's between 6:30 and 7:00, meaning she should be asleep by 7:30 to 8:00 p.m. the night before. She's averaging 9:00 p.m., due to her continually getting out of her crib.
Anna's sleep is always affected when she has a cold, as she does now. The last few nights she has been up every hour or so. The mucous is so loose that the bulb suction does her no good; it only sends her into screaming fits.
All this to say that never-ending sleep issues is enough to drive me into a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad mood (or decade). This is likely to continue until Anna is nearly seven, so I definitely need to learn to disengage emotionally from sleep issues. After doing my part, I have to let it go. Instead, I stew, I pray, I research, I plot, I stress. And yet still, sleep issues continue to come up--different season, different issue--but there is always something.
And guess what? Vacation Bible School is coming up. It goes until 8:30 p.m., for five consecutive nights. Just shoot me!
And this post will now have to be labeled--to be continued. Anna Grace has been in here with me during her morning nap, from which she has awakened no less than three times! Time to channel the sandman once again.
Have a good day! I'll be busy over here trying to disengage emotionally from all the failed, my-nose-is-too-snotty baby naps.
And hanging on to this verse:
A cheerful heart is good medicine. Proverbs 17:22
I wrote of my made-up joy songs; I would start singing whenever there was an incident threatening to rob me of joy, such as a major spill or a major behavior issue. Recently, Joy's post about her household triggers made me realize that I need to identify my own "triggers", so that I can pray through them, or avoid them altogether.
My joy-song method became counter-productive around here; they began causing the children to go into hyperactive, loud frenzies, from which they had trouble "coming down". One of the problems with having hyperactive kids is that when things get really happy or loosey goosey, you spend the next hour trying to get the household back down to earth, which usually involves one or more of them receiving consequences for not controlling themselves. While Daniel appears to be the only "officially hyperactive" one, Emily and Anna are close seconds. Any child between two and three will experience their highest lifetime activity level, according to the experts; so the jury is still out on Emily Rose's hyperactivity--time will tell more.
Anna is about the most wiggly baby you'll find; at six months, she is already crawling two steps or paces. And it takes two adults to bath her! You can't eat with her in your lap, due to her wiggling. Getting the food to your mouth while still keeping her in your lap is impossible. It is VERY common for there to be more than one ADD/ADHD child in a family, and also common for one or both parents to be similarly affected. I secretly think it's Don and he secretly thinks it's me. LOL
But that's digressing. As I read more about the struggles of other (homeschooling) women in regards to keeping a tidy house, I am getting to a place of acceptance about untidiness. That's not to say I won't keep working on it though. It is less of a trigger--although sticky, muddy floors will probably always get to me, and I'll probably continue to be on my hands and knees with wet paper towels 5 - 10 times a day.
One huge trigger that has followed me from the day I became a mom, is my preoccupation with my children's sleep patterns. Right now, Emily is still getting out of her crib before bedtime and before her nap, leading to less overall sleep. No, she isn't particularly cranky--something that the experts point out as a sign of too little sleep. And no, she isn't any MORE hyper than before--another sign of too little sleep. Yet she is getting less than the recommended sleep for her age, and less than she appeared to need even a month ago. We've been consistent in how we've dealt with it, but it continues. Could be the light coming into the room earlier than before, but there is little I can do about that. She has vertical blinds, which keep it pretty dark regardless.
Daniel is currently very excited about the fireflies, and rightly so. The trouble we have every year, from mid-June until the end of July, is that they light up around 9 p.m., and Daniel functions best when he is asleep by 8:30 p.m. We compromise and allow him to catch them every few nights, for fifteen minutes, after he has had his bath and his teeth brushed and his story time is done, leaving only prayer time and tuck in--which still puts him asleep at about 9:40 p.m. He's too excited to sleep before that, apparently from watching the flies light up his bedside. And what's the fun of catching them if one can't watch them do their lantern magic? I get all that. This is the stuff of which memories are made; we'd best not interfere too much.
The boys' sleep (and mine, Don's and Anna's) is also affected right now because when Emily gets out of her crib in the morning, she goes into the boys room and gets into bed with Daniel for a nice cuddle, (just precious--I agree) waking both boys, if they weren't already awake. She used to wake up around 8 or 8:30, but now it's between 6:30 and 7:00, meaning she should be asleep by 7:30 to 8:00 p.m. the night before. She's averaging 9:00 p.m., due to her continually getting out of her crib.
Anna's sleep is always affected when she has a cold, as she does now. The last few nights she has been up every hour or so. The mucous is so loose that the bulb suction does her no good; it only sends her into screaming fits.
All this to say that never-ending sleep issues is enough to drive me into a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad mood (or decade). This is likely to continue until Anna is nearly seven, so I definitely need to learn to disengage emotionally from sleep issues. After doing my part, I have to let it go. Instead, I stew, I pray, I research, I plot, I stress. And yet still, sleep issues continue to come up--different season, different issue--but there is always something.
And guess what? Vacation Bible School is coming up. It goes until 8:30 p.m., for five consecutive nights. Just shoot me!
And this post will now have to be labeled--to be continued. Anna Grace has been in here with me during her morning nap, from which she has awakened no less than three times! Time to channel the sandman once again.
Have a good day! I'll be busy over here trying to disengage emotionally from all the failed, my-nose-is-too-snotty baby naps.
And hanging on to this verse:
A cheerful heart is good medicine. Proverbs 17:22
Saturday, June 6, 2009
A PORTION OF MY DAY
Emily Rose is waking up a little earlier everyday. She's gone from her standard 8:30 a.m. wake up, to a barely respectable 6:45 a.m. Like my friend Jess, I suspect it is the light coming into the room too early. Room darkening shades--when we can afford them--are a necessary purchase, I fear. For now, dinner, baths and bedtime have been moved to earlier times.
Don works two part-time cleaning jobs. He was gone a good portion of the day today--giving me a good idea of how things will be when he begins school and study time away from home.
Here is a typical glimpse:
3:30 - Time for Anna's nap. I nurse her, put her in her crib, and then go to the playroom to check on Emily Rose and the boys. Emily has a number two in her trainer, which I immediately smell. I take her into her bedroom for a clean-up and change. She wiggles and the messy diaper makes a mess on the changing pad. I move her off of it and roll it up to be washed later. I finish the change.
3:45 - Put Emily back in the playroom (which is gated at this time), put soiled linens on top of washer, wash hands. I go to check on Anna, who has not yet fallen asleep. I pat her a few times, reach down and kiss her, tell her I love her, and exit to check on the others.
Finding that Emily Rose successfully climbed over the gate, I suggest she play with her teacups and some water at the kitchen table. She happily agrees. I get it set up for her, put her in her booster seat, and buckle her in, so she can't escape and get into trouble while I check on Anna. Then I go check on Anna again.
4:00 - Anna has not fallen asleep. Her nap is now 30 minutes late. I contemplate what to do.
Meanwhile, the boys ask to go outside, and I say yes. I help them find their hats. I notice that Emily has poured her water all over the table, and that her shorts and shirt are wet. I pick her up and take off her wet clothes, noticing that her trainer again is soiled, which is a very unusual pattern for her.
4:15 - I change Emily again, and get her ready to play outside. While I do that, I notice Timothy is out without his hat. I go outside to give it to him, while Emily tries to put her shoes on herself. I quickly go check Anna, and find she has soiled her diaper and clothes. I change her, deposit soiled clothes on top of washer, wash my hands, kiss her, and give her the binky.
Then I let Emily outside, first checking that the fence gate is closed and locked. While I am briefly out there, Daniel tells me that Timothy poured out most of a $9 bottle of sunscreen onto the lawn--just for fun, apparently. I am livid. I pull him in and put him to bed, telling him that I won't buy popsicles for him for three weeks, as that would equal the total cost of the sunscreen.
Daniel didn't tell me this right away, but pouring out the sunscreen was his idea. He is feeling guilty, but not ready to tell me. This is all unbeknownst to me, since Timothy didn't mention it being Daniel's idea--not that I gave him a chance to mention anything. His consequence was very swift, since I was so angry at the senselessness of his act.
Daniel is feeling guilty enough that he no longer wants to be outside.
I can now hear the baby crying, so I tell Daniel and Emily that I must rock Anna to sleep, since she is now an hour late for her nap. I tell them they must go to the playroom. I put up two tension gates (one on top of the other), in an attempt to keep Emily Rose in the playroom, which I peruse for dangers first.
4:30 - I go to get Anna, and find her freshly-donned outfit covered in spit-up, which has also soiled the sheets. I wipe her with a warm washcloth, change her, take off the bedding, and go to rock her--depositing the soiled linen on the washer first.
4:40 - I rock Anna, all the while praying that Emily stays in the playroom with Daniel and that I don't hear any ruckus in there. Daddy took the boys to the library earlier in the day, so they happen to be watching a Magic School Bus video, which I hope engages Emily long enough for Anna is fall asleep. Anna is transferring better to the crib now from the rocker, so I anticipate putting her there after about fifteen minutes of rocking.
However, since she is now overtired, she thrashes and cries for twenty-five minutes before falling asleep. She has no interest in nursing again, perhaps because of the teeth she is working on right now. Once she is asleep, I plead with the Lord that the other two stay engaged so that I can transfer Anna to the crib without mishap. But no, Daniel decides to let Emily out, and comes to me and says that he will watch Emily. Ha! Daniel is no babysitter! I am livid, and I give him my meanest look, and tell him to take her back immediately, and try to engage her with a story while I transfer Anna to the crib. I use my looks, and keep my voice at a whisper, so as not to wake Anna.
Daniel gets the message, and I am able to transfer Anna successfully.
I now have my second migraine of the day, and it isn't time yet for another dose of Excedrin. I chastise myself for getting so hungry and thirsty, which probably caused the second migraine-- although I know there was no opportunity to eat during the past couple hours, and barely time to drink.
The above is how it typically goes when I am by myself. It is extremely difficult and stressful, and I have a hard time smiling or being light-hearted with the kids. There are constantly things that must be taken care of NOW, either because of safety, or because of maintaining proper hygiene.
Meanwhile, the dishes don't get done, and the laundry either doesn't get started, or it doesn't get finished--until after bedtime. I watch the clock, counting down the time until Don will be home and I'll have help. He has had all four of them by himself a few times only, but that is all it took for him to understand how gruelling it can be.
I spoke to the Lord the whole day, and tried hard to listen to his voice. Some things came to my mind that will make things a bit easier.
- Run everything like a daycare, with schedules for meals, snacks, bathroom time, outside time, free time, lesson time, storytime, activity time, quiet time, etc. This predictability will cut down on behavior issues and condense my clean-up times. They will have much less freedom, but overall things will be safer, and they'll end up getting more attention from me, rather than me just following after them and essentially just cleaning up disasters and putting out fires.
We had such a schedule before Anna Grace was born--although not nearly so regimented.
God will have to help with the potty training and the spit-up problem, since they both take up a whole lot of time and energy--not to mention patience. He will also have to help Anna fall asleep on time, so that she doesn't get cranky and overtired. She is doing better overall--notwithstanding this teething period. The main problem is that she needs at least one nap that is a full two hours, and she never sleeps more than 50 minutes on her own, necessitating at least one hour of rocking to finish one of her naps--most likely the nap that coincides with Emily's. This will have to be quiet activity or TV time for the boys.
Anyhow, I'll figure it out, as long as I keep talking to God--asking for answers and patience. It is likely to be difficult like this until Emily stops getting into things, which I remember occurs around 36 to 42 months old. By then of course, the baby will be getting into things.
COUNT IT ALL JOY!
Don works two part-time cleaning jobs. He was gone a good portion of the day today--giving me a good idea of how things will be when he begins school and study time away from home.
Here is a typical glimpse:
3:30 - Time for Anna's nap. I nurse her, put her in her crib, and then go to the playroom to check on Emily Rose and the boys. Emily has a number two in her trainer, which I immediately smell. I take her into her bedroom for a clean-up and change. She wiggles and the messy diaper makes a mess on the changing pad. I move her off of it and roll it up to be washed later. I finish the change.
3:45 - Put Emily back in the playroom (which is gated at this time), put soiled linens on top of washer, wash hands. I go to check on Anna, who has not yet fallen asleep. I pat her a few times, reach down and kiss her, tell her I love her, and exit to check on the others.
Finding that Emily Rose successfully climbed over the gate, I suggest she play with her teacups and some water at the kitchen table. She happily agrees. I get it set up for her, put her in her booster seat, and buckle her in, so she can't escape and get into trouble while I check on Anna. Then I go check on Anna again.
4:00 - Anna has not fallen asleep. Her nap is now 30 minutes late. I contemplate what to do.
Meanwhile, the boys ask to go outside, and I say yes. I help them find their hats. I notice that Emily has poured her water all over the table, and that her shorts and shirt are wet. I pick her up and take off her wet clothes, noticing that her trainer again is soiled, which is a very unusual pattern for her.
4:15 - I change Emily again, and get her ready to play outside. While I do that, I notice Timothy is out without his hat. I go outside to give it to him, while Emily tries to put her shoes on herself. I quickly go check Anna, and find she has soiled her diaper and clothes. I change her, deposit soiled clothes on top of washer, wash my hands, kiss her, and give her the binky.
Then I let Emily outside, first checking that the fence gate is closed and locked. While I am briefly out there, Daniel tells me that Timothy poured out most of a $9 bottle of sunscreen onto the lawn--just for fun, apparently. I am livid. I pull him in and put him to bed, telling him that I won't buy popsicles for him for three weeks, as that would equal the total cost of the sunscreen.
Daniel didn't tell me this right away, but pouring out the sunscreen was his idea. He is feeling guilty, but not ready to tell me. This is all unbeknownst to me, since Timothy didn't mention it being Daniel's idea--not that I gave him a chance to mention anything. His consequence was very swift, since I was so angry at the senselessness of his act.
Daniel is feeling guilty enough that he no longer wants to be outside.
I can now hear the baby crying, so I tell Daniel and Emily that I must rock Anna to sleep, since she is now an hour late for her nap. I tell them they must go to the playroom. I put up two tension gates (one on top of the other), in an attempt to keep Emily Rose in the playroom, which I peruse for dangers first.
4:30 - I go to get Anna, and find her freshly-donned outfit covered in spit-up, which has also soiled the sheets. I wipe her with a warm washcloth, change her, take off the bedding, and go to rock her--depositing the soiled linen on the washer first.
4:40 - I rock Anna, all the while praying that Emily stays in the playroom with Daniel and that I don't hear any ruckus in there. Daddy took the boys to the library earlier in the day, so they happen to be watching a Magic School Bus video, which I hope engages Emily long enough for Anna is fall asleep. Anna is transferring better to the crib now from the rocker, so I anticipate putting her there after about fifteen minutes of rocking.
However, since she is now overtired, she thrashes and cries for twenty-five minutes before falling asleep. She has no interest in nursing again, perhaps because of the teeth she is working on right now. Once she is asleep, I plead with the Lord that the other two stay engaged so that I can transfer Anna to the crib without mishap. But no, Daniel decides to let Emily out, and comes to me and says that he will watch Emily. Ha! Daniel is no babysitter! I am livid, and I give him my meanest look, and tell him to take her back immediately, and try to engage her with a story while I transfer Anna to the crib. I use my looks, and keep my voice at a whisper, so as not to wake Anna.
Daniel gets the message, and I am able to transfer Anna successfully.
I now have my second migraine of the day, and it isn't time yet for another dose of Excedrin. I chastise myself for getting so hungry and thirsty, which probably caused the second migraine-- although I know there was no opportunity to eat during the past couple hours, and barely time to drink.
The above is how it typically goes when I am by myself. It is extremely difficult and stressful, and I have a hard time smiling or being light-hearted with the kids. There are constantly things that must be taken care of NOW, either because of safety, or because of maintaining proper hygiene.
Meanwhile, the dishes don't get done, and the laundry either doesn't get started, or it doesn't get finished--until after bedtime. I watch the clock, counting down the time until Don will be home and I'll have help. He has had all four of them by himself a few times only, but that is all it took for him to understand how gruelling it can be.
I spoke to the Lord the whole day, and tried hard to listen to his voice. Some things came to my mind that will make things a bit easier.
- Run everything like a daycare, with schedules for meals, snacks, bathroom time, outside time, free time, lesson time, storytime, activity time, quiet time, etc. This predictability will cut down on behavior issues and condense my clean-up times. They will have much less freedom, but overall things will be safer, and they'll end up getting more attention from me, rather than me just following after them and essentially just cleaning up disasters and putting out fires.
We had such a schedule before Anna Grace was born--although not nearly so regimented.
God will have to help with the potty training and the spit-up problem, since they both take up a whole lot of time and energy--not to mention patience. He will also have to help Anna fall asleep on time, so that she doesn't get cranky and overtired. She is doing better overall--notwithstanding this teething period. The main problem is that she needs at least one nap that is a full two hours, and she never sleeps more than 50 minutes on her own, necessitating at least one hour of rocking to finish one of her naps--most likely the nap that coincides with Emily's. This will have to be quiet activity or TV time for the boys.
Anyhow, I'll figure it out, as long as I keep talking to God--asking for answers and patience. It is likely to be difficult like this until Emily stops getting into things, which I remember occurs around 36 to 42 months old. By then of course, the baby will be getting into things.
COUNT IT ALL JOY!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Sideways
Anna Grace is behind me trying to drift off to sleep--with some encouragement from me--so I have a few minutes to organize some thoughts on joy.
Earlier I identified a struggle with always having to go sideways with my day--or with my plans-- rather than forward. I'm forced to do so many sideway moves, that at the end of the day there's no measurable forward motion.
Now what, exactly, is forward motion, as it applies to my situation? Everyday the children are a day older and a day wiser. Isn't that going forward? What more do I want as a stay-at-home mom? Isn't my goal to raise Godly children who are ready for college, God-inspired courtship, a Godly marriage, and then parenting?
When I have self-serving goals, that's when the sideways moves become frustrating. If I have a servant's heart, and my focus is merely the teaching and training of my children--and the teaching and training of my own heart--then my daily accomplishments, as measured by a to-do list, matter little.
So what are my self-serving ideas/goals? It still goes back to this: The borrowed idea that successful moms have orderly homes and lives. Having that order--that brand of Martha-type vs. Mary-type success--is what makes me feel like I need to be moving measurably forward.
Now what are my fears in regards to not achieving that brand of success? Sadly--when I break it down--my fear is that I'll be branded unsuccessful in the world's eyes. And THAT definitely has selfishness and insecurity at its root.
My joy songs will flow faster, and they'll be more heart-felt, when I get rid of the self-serving baggage and grow a servant's heart. Organizational skills are necessary and valuable. But again, not as an end in themselves.
So, God, there it is. You wanted me to identify it, and I did. Now help me get rid of it! Please!
Earlier I identified a struggle with always having to go sideways with my day--or with my plans-- rather than forward. I'm forced to do so many sideway moves, that at the end of the day there's no measurable forward motion.
Now what, exactly, is forward motion, as it applies to my situation? Everyday the children are a day older and a day wiser. Isn't that going forward? What more do I want as a stay-at-home mom? Isn't my goal to raise Godly children who are ready for college, God-inspired courtship, a Godly marriage, and then parenting?
When I have self-serving goals, that's when the sideways moves become frustrating. If I have a servant's heart, and my focus is merely the teaching and training of my children--and the teaching and training of my own heart--then my daily accomplishments, as measured by a to-do list, matter little.
So what are my self-serving ideas/goals? It still goes back to this: The borrowed idea that successful moms have orderly homes and lives. Having that order--that brand of Martha-type vs. Mary-type success--is what makes me feel like I need to be moving measurably forward.
Now what are my fears in regards to not achieving that brand of success? Sadly--when I break it down--my fear is that I'll be branded unsuccessful in the world's eyes. And THAT definitely has selfishness and insecurity at its root.
My joy songs will flow faster, and they'll be more heart-felt, when I get rid of the self-serving baggage and grow a servant's heart. Organizational skills are necessary and valuable. But again, not as an end in themselves.
So, God, there it is. You wanted me to identify it, and I did. Now help me get rid of it! Please!
WHATEVER!
This morning presented the most challenge yet to my rejuvenated, joy-seeking heart.
A carpet steamer was rented to deal with our bedroom's vomit smell, which was acquired courtesy of Daniel's migraine, if you remember. We finished up the cleaning yesterday and returned the steamer. This morning, Emily Rose picked up the remote-control truck my mother bought for Daniel during her recent visit. The boys had taken it out on a wet, rainy day, and it somehow acquired watery mud, which leaked onto the freshly steam-cleaned playroom carpet as she picked it up.
Ordinarily this wouldn't be a problem, as the carpet is very tightly woven and almost anything comes off of it with spot remover and some light blotting. However, the sprayer went out on the spot remover can, and I couldn't get the stain up, necessitating a trip to the store--delaying all the other things I need to do. This annoyance is occurring in the midst of my efforts to consolidate store trips so that they interfere less with our schooling and other routines.
My husband, a prolific milk drinker (I switched him from whole milk to skim when we got married....how's that for submission? ha ha), is drinking even more milk than usual, presumably close to two gallons in 2.5 days, which is also messing up my plans to consolidate errands. Actually--joking aside--he does like that I look out for his health.
So my joy songs were less enthusiastic. But it still came to my mind--within about three minutes of the annoyances--that a joy song was called for. I'm getting there.
The key to daily joy in the midst of raising messy young'uns, is to NOT be especially attached to any of your "plans". Our motto almost has to be...WHATEVER!
A carpet steamer was rented to deal with our bedroom's vomit smell, which was acquired courtesy of Daniel's migraine, if you remember. We finished up the cleaning yesterday and returned the steamer. This morning, Emily Rose picked up the remote-control truck my mother bought for Daniel during her recent visit. The boys had taken it out on a wet, rainy day, and it somehow acquired watery mud, which leaked onto the freshly steam-cleaned playroom carpet as she picked it up.
Ordinarily this wouldn't be a problem, as the carpet is very tightly woven and almost anything comes off of it with spot remover and some light blotting. However, the sprayer went out on the spot remover can, and I couldn't get the stain up, necessitating a trip to the store--delaying all the other things I need to do. This annoyance is occurring in the midst of my efforts to consolidate store trips so that they interfere less with our schooling and other routines.
My husband, a prolific milk drinker (I switched him from whole milk to skim when we got married....how's that for submission? ha ha), is drinking even more milk than usual, presumably close to two gallons in 2.5 days, which is also messing up my plans to consolidate errands. Actually--joking aside--he does like that I look out for his health.
So my joy songs were less enthusiastic. But it still came to my mind--within about three minutes of the annoyances--that a joy song was called for. I'm getting there.
The key to daily joy in the midst of raising messy young'uns, is to NOT be especially attached to any of your "plans". Our motto almost has to be...WHATEVER!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Kind of Magical
Well, Jess, things are not great here sleep wise either. The rest of my children teethed between 8 and 11.5 months. I noticed that Anna Grace was having trouble drifting peacefully off, despite the fact that she should NOT have been overtired. Yesterday was the second day of this, so out of curiosity I checked her gums. She has both incisors coming in on top! There is no jagged edge through yet, but the teeth are right there ready to break through. I've never heard of the incisors coming through before the front bottom or front top teeth.
Most of my day yesterday was spent either trying to GET her to sleep, or trying to put her BACK to sleep. If Don had not been here most of the day, I don't know what I would have done. He's working a part-time job from 10:30 p.m. to 1:30 a.m. (cleaning offices this time). The hours are conducive to the tech school hours, should he be awarded the grant.
Anyway, this is one high-maintenance baby! The spit up is still prolific too. Today I am contemplating some Tylenol before at least one of the naps.
Here is my sleep joy song:
Count it all joy, joy, joy!
When baby gets teeth, teeth, teeth,
And the entire daaaaaaaaay, aaaa, aaaaa,
Is spent preoccupied with sleep, sleep, sleep!
Count it all JOY! (Leap up in the air when you get to the last line)
Repeat four times.
Rest of children will start jumping with you.
Then you realize that nothing is really that serious.
Or annoying.
Because there are smiles, laughter, and boundless joy energy all around you.
The thing about joy is....it's contagious! Kind of magical that way. It's neat.
We never rent videos anymore, now that we have four children and too much to do, but I think we'll have to join a video store so I can rent "The Sound Of Music". I need to get in touch with my inner Julie Andrews. Then maybe my voice will sound as good as hers.
Once a first grader said to me at the beginning of the year: "Mrs. Colosky sings a LOT better than you!" She was his K teacher. lol
Most of my day yesterday was spent either trying to GET her to sleep, or trying to put her BACK to sleep. If Don had not been here most of the day, I don't know what I would have done. He's working a part-time job from 10:30 p.m. to 1:30 a.m. (cleaning offices this time). The hours are conducive to the tech school hours, should he be awarded the grant.
Anyway, this is one high-maintenance baby! The spit up is still prolific too. Today I am contemplating some Tylenol before at least one of the naps.
Here is my sleep joy song:
Count it all joy, joy, joy!
When baby gets teeth, teeth, teeth,
And the entire daaaaaaaaay, aaaa, aaaaa,
Is spent preoccupied with sleep, sleep, sleep!
Count it all JOY! (Leap up in the air when you get to the last line)
Repeat four times.
Rest of children will start jumping with you.
Then you realize that nothing is really that serious.
Or annoying.
Because there are smiles, laughter, and boundless joy energy all around you.
The thing about joy is....it's contagious! Kind of magical that way. It's neat.
We never rent videos anymore, now that we have four children and too much to do, but I think we'll have to join a video store so I can rent "The Sound Of Music". I need to get in touch with my inner Julie Andrews. Then maybe my voice will sound as good as hers.
Once a first grader said to me at the beginning of the year: "Mrs. Colosky sings a LOT better than you!" She was his K teacher. lol
Monday, June 1, 2009
Diary of a Routine?
Perhaps I should ask the Flylady how I can stick to a routine when random events are just itching to throw me off. In the last 36 hours:
- The water heater went out.
- Daniel had another unexplained vomiting incident. I suspect migraines; before I thought it was post-nasal drip irritation. I believe this is the sixth incident in the last year.
-I now have an odor problem to solve in my bedroom, which is where he decided to vomit.
-Don accidentally turned off the gas to the furnace while we were dealing with the water heater, and today he can't get it to stay lit; the house is 66 degrees.
-I learned my drivers license expired on my birthday, and I've been driving on it for over two months. Things need to slow down here so I can escape to go renew it.
-Because we're thrown off by all the broken things, Daniel is going high as a kite on us; he can't deal with change.
-Rosey has decided to start getting out of her crib for naps. That one won't be so easy to solve; continually putting her back takes up a good portion of her naptime, meaning she sleeps too late and it messes up her nighttime sleep.
We'll figure it all out, but in the meantime, I'm irritated at the FlyLady for assuming routines are so easy!
And yes, I will try to find restorative time with the Lord today. I quite obviously need it.
- The water heater went out.
- Daniel had another unexplained vomiting incident. I suspect migraines; before I thought it was post-nasal drip irritation. I believe this is the sixth incident in the last year.
-I now have an odor problem to solve in my bedroom, which is where he decided to vomit.
-Don accidentally turned off the gas to the furnace while we were dealing with the water heater, and today he can't get it to stay lit; the house is 66 degrees.
-I learned my drivers license expired on my birthday, and I've been driving on it for over two months. Things need to slow down here so I can escape to go renew it.
-Because we're thrown off by all the broken things, Daniel is going high as a kite on us; he can't deal with change.
-Rosey has decided to start getting out of her crib for naps. That one won't be so easy to solve; continually putting her back takes up a good portion of her naptime, meaning she sleeps too late and it messes up her nighttime sleep.
We'll figure it all out, but in the meantime, I'm irritated at the FlyLady for assuming routines are so easy!
And yes, I will try to find restorative time with the Lord today. I quite obviously need it.
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